REACTIONS
Verse of the week: Matthew 15:32
Then Jesus called his disciples to him and said, "I have compassion on the crowd, because they have been with me now three days, and have nothing to eat; and I am unwilling to send them away hungry, lest they faint on the way."
Last week’s message was Week 3 in the ‘Art of Connection’ series, and we talked about our buttons. Buttons are sensitive spots that, when triggered, sets off an emotional reaction.
In the context of relationships, we learned that while partners or friends may push our buttons, they usually didn’t create them. These buttons typically get formed early on in life, and can stick with us for years. You may not even realize you carry a certain button, but it can be triggered years later by a familiar emotion or situation.
We all have buttons, and we can take steps to silence them, but the reality is they will get pushed. So how do we react when that happens?
We’re human with very human emotions. This can cause us to have some less-than-ideal reactions. Here are some of the common ones – stop me if you’ve reacted with like this before:
Blame
Control
Fix-it mode
Isolate
Exaggerate
Anger
Passive aggressive
Self-abandon
This good news is, these are common for a reason. Many people respond like this when their buttons are pressed – you’re not alone, and these reactions do not make you a bad person. Continuing with our example of Elijah from last week, we can see that even he, a strong spiritual figure, reacted out of his emotions instead of his faith sometimes.
1 Kings 19:2-4 illustrates the buttons that were pushed in Elijah’s life when the king’s wife wanted him dead. Let’s see exactly what the Bible tells us of his struggles:
So Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah to say, “May the gods deal with me, be it ever so severely, if by this time tomorrow I do not make your life like that of one of them.” Elijah was afraid and ran for his life. When he came to Beersheba in Judah, he left his servant there, while he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness. He came to a broom bush, sat down under it and prayed that he might die. “I have had enough, Lord,” he said. “Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.”
We can see that Elijah was afraid. And when we felt fear, he became overwhelmed and ran away. He left his servant and isolated himself. And then he sat down and asked to die – he became pessimistic and was ready to give up.
This is Elijah we’re talking about! He wasn’t just a random guy…he was a prophet who literally had called down fire from heaven just the day before. And even he reacted just like us when his buttons were pressed.
No one starts in spiritual maturity or emotional health, not even Elijah. We need to grow into it. Thankfully, we’re not left to grow in our own strength. God wants to meet us where we’re at, and bring us peace even in the most overwhelming situations, just like He did with Elijah.
Reading on in 1 Kings 19:11, God speaks directly to Elijah, and invites him into His presence. Elijah eventually recognized that God was right there. He just needed to slow down and stop running to find Him. That’s what happens when we bring God our buttons too – He shows up.
God’s peace is comforting, but it doesn’t “fix” our triggers. God actually calls us into a deeper level of faith. In 1 Kings 19:15, once Elijah finds peace in God’s presence, God also challenges him to go back the to the same place he fled. God doesn’t just want to comfort you in tough times, He actually wants to lead us back to a new reality in that same triggering space. He wants to restore relationships. Renew friendships. Heal past hurts for good.
That’s where the real change happens. When we experience God’s peace and perfect love and are filled with His Spirit, our reactions slowly start to change from a human, emotional response, to a more grace-filled response. We can change how we react to our buttons with His strength.
Make sure to check out the full message below!
